their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
