Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
