So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I skipped work to stalk him.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Randomize
