I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Randomize
