She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
