my room smells like sperm. sweet.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
