God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
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