Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
