I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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