the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize