This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
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No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
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You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
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