I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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