I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
