If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I fill condoms, not promises.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
