I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
What a dumb baby whore.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize