I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
