ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
