I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she told me i tasted like america
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Mom said you looked used
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
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