i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
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