I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
This beer is not sobering me up at all
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
