butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
