i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
