so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter