Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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