I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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