# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
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