Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
