Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Randomize