in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
