just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
