And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Randomize
