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• (314): View more from Missouri

  He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?

  (1-314): View more from Missouri

  No. Take one for the team.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  What's the big deal? you guys fuck

  (1-870): View more from Arkansas

  3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  he confused my yawn for an orgasm

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• (206): View more from Washington

  Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (406): View more from Montana

  We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to

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• (805): View more from California

  Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.

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