mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I think my nap took me to another dimension
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
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