you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
