hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
