check it out our google latitudes are spooning
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
