then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
