So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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