Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize