why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
