I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
