I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
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