There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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