eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
