I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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