He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
last night I used snow as a chaser
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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