Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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