so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
