another moral hangover. fuck.
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
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