I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize