His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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